Helping Baltimore's grieving kids heal

At just 7 years old, Kyron Chase is facing the
unimaginable: His father was murdered.
"Telling my son his father had been killed was one of the
hardest things I've ever had to do," said Kimberly Vinson,
Kyron's mother. "Their bond, it was just a bond that a lot
of kids don't have with their father."
Kyron has struggled to cope after his father's death in
December. And Vinson, left to raise two small children on
her own, has struggled to fill the void for her son.
"My concern is how he will make it through this," she said.
Last year, Baltimore's homicide rate hit a four-year high.
Yet families such as Vinson's have few resources to help
them heal from the trauma of a relative's sudden death.
That's where Annette March-Grier steps in. Her
nonprofit in Baltimore helps children and their families cope
with grief.
"A child's grief over the loss of a loved one is often
complicated by the loss of security and identity," said
March-Grier, a bereavement counselor and registered
nurse. "This shift can be very dangerous if there's no
support system there."
"Our program provides that safe place for a child to
recover."
Since 2008, her organization, Roberta's House, has
provided free grief support programs to more than 2,100
people -- nearly half of them children.
When death strikes a childhood
March-Grier's vision for Roberta's House stemmed from
her childhood. She grew up in her family's funeral home.
"As a little girl, I would sit at the top of the stairs and
peer down between the banister rails, watching as families
gathered around their deceased loved ones," said March-
Grier, 53. "Death was all around me."
Through the years, she met thousands of grieving families
-- especially children -- struggling to cope with their loss.
"I love my city. ... But people here are having crisis after
crisis," she said. "The violence in this city and grief are
directly connected."
Today, Roberta's House -- named for March-Grier's
late mother -- offers peer support groups, counseling and
specialized workshops to anyone in the community.
The Family Program is tailored to children 5 to 17.
Volunteers help them explore their feelings and learn
healthy ways of coping through journaling, games and arts
and crafts. The group also offers a three-day summer
camp.
"We teach our children it's OK to cry, (that) crying is
really an indication of love, not an expression of weakness,"
March-Grier said.
Kyron and his mom have been attending sessions at
Roberta's House for a month. Vinson says her son is
opening up more about his feelings and his dad.
"I (wanted) to let him know that there are other (children)
that are going through the same thing he's going through,"
she said.
Changing the game
Since 2011, March-Grier says she has also been helping
juvenile offenders cope with different types of loss, such as
the incarceration of a parent or sexual abuse.
The teenagers go through a six-month program aimed to
help them get on the right track. To that end, March-
Grier uses a "scared straight" tactic: She stages a funeral
for the teens and tells them to imagine it's theirs.
"We take them to the funeral home and help them see that
if you're going to play the game, you have to realize there
is an end to this game," she said. "This is our way of
trying to reach them before it's too late."
March-Grier believes grief is a public health problem. She
often takes her message out into the community, providing
free workshops to children and adults at local schools,
churches, hospices and community centers.
"Unresolved grief can cause people to go through life
severely wounded," she said. "Our goal is to help people
understand that grief does not have to destroy them."
With plans to expand her services and move to a larger
location, March-Grier wants to continue her parent's
legacy in Baltimore.
"We're giving families in this city a sense of hope," she
said. "We're helping to heal wounds and bring families back
together again."
Want to get involved? Check out the Roberta's House
website at www.robertashouse.org and see how to help.